Ratz March!

Ratz mebbe see protests! Iz Thurzday. Iz for downtownz. Iz for Legal Observingz, sez Grey Rat and White Rat. Sez, mebbe civil libertiez iz like cheez. Sez, iz one of most important cheezez! Iz so humanz can all haz cheez! Ratz sez, iz mebbe importantz.



But ratz sez, where IZ all humanz? Wai no humanz? Iz not importantz? Iz sunny dayz, but no humanz. Ratz wonderz.



Ratz sez, iz CNN truck! Iz excitedz! Sez, mebbe ratz in Indonesiaz will see ratz in Pittzburgh. Ratz sez, even though they iz Pittzburgh ratz now, all ratz are born in Indonesiaz. Sez, ratz iz Legal Observingz todayz, but knowz about globalization and tradez. Ratz sez, we wuz born in Indonesia, but Ikea iz from Swedenz. Sez, now ratz iz American ratz, living in Pittzburgh. Protects important americanz cheez.



Ratz sez, iz big dish. Holdz lotz of cheez.



Rat sez, iz first protest! Iz for humanz in Africaz!



Grey Rat sez, iz policez!



Ratz meet more policez. Sez, stayz on barricadez. Sez, Grrr! Ratz scared. Ratz wonder, will policez arrest ratz? Take ratz away? But ratz say, mebbe not. Ratz say, hopez policez likez cheez. Ratz sez, mebbe police not arrest ratz?



Ratz sez, riot horsez stinkeyz.



Ratz sez, iz watching humanz. Sez, Free Tibet!



Ratz sez, iz Lawrencevillez okiez?

Ratz at the G-20!

Ratz sez, iz G-20 tomorrow! Iz excitedz! Ratz sez, mebbe iz good for werld economiez to talkz and werkz together. Iz big industrialz and emergingz nationz! White Rat and Grey Rat sez, but needz development with compassionz. Needz to care for environmentz! But Rattatafish sez, NO! Let state of naturez rulez! Long livez the invisible hand! Might iz right! Imperializm and CHEEZ!



White Rat and Grey Rat sez, Pittzburgh luvz! Iz helloz! Mebbe meetz other Ratz from other countriez! Mebbe Pariz Ratz? Mebbe Tokyo Ratz?



Ratz sez, iz welcome tablez for press! Ratz sez, iz green! Not like cheez!



Ratz see protest from offize windowz. Get ratzeye view. Sez, Iz for healthcare! Ratz say, mebbe ratz need healthcare too! But iz sad when peoplez cannot get carez. Ratz say, mebbe they join? Mebbe they listenz?



Ratz at protest! Iz raining! Ratz say, lotz of peoplez! Haz umbrellas. Ratz shy. Stay in back of crowd. Mebbe they move up to see!



Ratz move closer! Listenz carefully! Sez, mebbe someday, we all getz sick humanz care. Sez, we all need to share the cheez.

Ratz Luv Small Treez!

Ratz seez small treez! Iz bonsai! Iz 'tree in a tray!' Ratz excited. Sez, iz tree made for ratz! wantz to climb! Iz curiouz!



Grey Rat explorez. White Rat sniffz! Treez make ratz happiez. Ratz say, iz matsu! Ratz wantz to make their own bonsai.



Ratz luv!

Ratz Cook!

Ratz visit kitchenz in Baltimore! Iz learning how to cookz! Iz not cheez, but haz vegetablez and chickenz.




At first, humanz iz surprised to find ratz in kitchenz.



But ratz say, Wantz to Cookz! so humanz teach.



Ratz happiez to learnz. Luvz.

Finnegan!

Ratz haz new name! Iz Finnegan Niblett. Iz happiez. Feelz luvz. Finnegan sez tank oo!

Pleaz! Needz namez!

Hewwoz. Iz new rat! Needz namez! Wantz luvz.

Unnamed White Rat came home at the same time as Rawg and Rattatafish. He is an especially shy rat. When I met him at Ikea, he looked very sad. He was perched on the very edge of the shelf and kept looking at me. He looked like he wanted to be hugged and taken home, but also looked as if he thought it would never happen. Rat has these buck teeth, and i think he's hyper-aware of it. I think he's been passed over many times in favor of other ratz with better teeth, you see. He's painfully shy. Rat likes cheez like all other ratz, but nibbles instead of gnaws.

Email/chat me with suggestions, if you read this.

Ratz Watch Baseballz!

Ratz luv watching bazeball! Ratz luv, but iz not cheez. Ratz luv cheez, but bazeball iz ok. Iz favorite sport! Iz watchingz HD! Ratz watch on tablez! Ratz say, iz 10th inningz!



Ratz watch bazeball on TV! Iz excited ratz. Iz talking about Dodgerz! Iz talking about D-bakz! Ratz wantz to see real bazeball in stadium. Iz super excitedz! Ratz wantz to sneak in to watch Piratz in Pittzburgh. Sez dat they wantz to meet McCutchenz. Ratz dunnot know what cracker jackz smellz like. Ratz wantz to know. Ratz want to sniffiez at hotdog smellz, even if it iz not cheez. Ratz say, mebbe we sit in bleecherz! Ratz want to catch foul ballz! Ratz sad that bazeball iz almost over for the yeer. But ratz say, iz ok. More next yeer!



Grey Ratz and White Ratz watch pitchez. Makez sure umpire iz not wack.

More Ratz at the Fair!

Ratz listenz to band! Iz named Mariage Blanc! White Rat announcez!

Ratz go to A Fair in the Park!

Ratz visitz A Fair in the Park! Iz happiez! Explorez artz and craftz! Learnz!



White Rat iz on phonez producingz local bandz. Grey Rat managez sound board. Sez iz good for peoplez to hear well-mixed sound. Iz with WYEP. Ratz likez WYEP. Iz friendliez. Haz good musicz.



White Ratz sez "Iz new band! Iz playz now! Tasty like cheez!"



Ratz watch artistz werk. Learnz about glass. Likez shiniez.



Ratz watch Turnerz Anonymouse on lathe. Iz fast! Like gnawingz, but haz no teethiez. Ratz likez. Makez topz.



After, Ratz look at bowl. iz handmade, but not by gnawing. Ratz say iz comfy!

Rattatafish sez NO TIPZ FOR YOU!

Rattatafish sez NO TIPZ. He sez, iz honor to serve Rattatafish. Iz service! Iz your werk to givez Rattatafish CHEEZ! No tipz!

Ratz Drive!

Ratz drivez carz on sunny dayz. Iz funz. Iz fleeingz pittzburgh, but only for weekendz. Ratz visitz other citiez. gnawz on other foodz. Likez gnawz on new cheez. Ratz iz very carefulz driverz. Iz likez not speedingz. Not likez Rattatafish. Rattatafish iz speediez rat. Rattatafish sez, "gnawz on da popo!" But White Rat and Grey Rat likez da popo. Dey drivez safe.

Ratz go Outz!

Ratz go to Buffalo Bluez! Haz beerz! White Ratz drinkz Bass. Grey Ratz drinkz Guiness. Afterwardz, dey haz munchiez.

Ratz Luv CHEEZ!!!

Ratz say cheez! Cheez cheez! Cheez CHEEZ!!!!!



(cheez!)



CHEEZ!!!!



cheez <3

Rattatafish Teachez Class

RATTATAFISH DEMANDZ REPEX! Rattatafish now teachez on ratssetz, liability, equity, and cheez. Rattatafish sez, Ratz needz more cheez. Iz not equitable. Humanz have more cheez than ratz. Rattatafish sez sekrit: iz running sekrit cheez cartel. Rattatafish might sekritly be piratz, too. He iz super shadyz ratz. He iz scheming for cheez domination. Rattatafish iz confidentz ratz. He no needz cuddlez like other ratz.



Cannot hearz Rattatafish? Rattatafish he movez onto podium. Iz to intimidatez you. Rattatafish no likez cuddlez. No likez friendz.



But sometimez, Rattatafish getz loneliez.

(dunnot tell Rattatafish that you knowz. he will killz.)

Ratz in Skool.

Ratz go to skoolz. Has laptopz. Ratz dunnot likez skoolz but likez lurking. Ratz gnaw on bookz and listenez. Skool helpz with Ratzwerk.

Meet New Ratz!

Five ratz!



And Rattatafish! Rattatafish iz King of Ratz. He iz like ninja. Iz super stealthy. Iz alwayz thinking of cheez. Dunnot cross Rattatafish. He iz crafty like macaroni kleenex box. Rattatafish haz supershady past. Rattatafish demandz mad respex. Rattatafish demandz a DELICIOUS PIECE OF CHEEZ!